Talking to Yourself

I was chatting away to my husband the other day when I realized he wasn’t paying attention to what I was saying. So, me being a wiseacre, I stopped and said loudly, “Halloooooo!!” He looked surprised and said, “Oh. Were you speaking to me? I thought you were talking to yourself.” 

Fast forward a few days later, and I was standing in the middle of the frozen veggie section, by myself, having a conversation. Out loud!! 

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“Hmmm, those peas look good.  I can make fried rice and tuna casserole this week. Or should I get the broccoli instead?” 

Suddenly, I realized what I was doing.  Talking out loud to no one in particular. Just having a good ol’ fashioned, one-sided conversation. 

I quickly looked around to see if anyone heard me, because, if so, they would most likely think I’m nuts. What the heck! Am I nuts???

Well, that remains to be seen, but lately I have noticed that I talk to myself.  Out loud!   And I do it more and more often! 

Talking to Myself

I talk to myself when I’m in the kitchen cooking dinner saying audibly, “Add 1 teaspoon of cumin” lest I forget how much I need to measure out for the recipe. 

When I’m at work and planning my next task. “Time to look at my email.”

When I’m looking in the closet and deciding what to wear.  

When I’m in the car and another driver pisses  me off…well, who am I kidding – I’ve always yelled out loud when that happens!  (One of the joys of living in Northern Virginia and All. The. Traffic.).  

So, it’s no wonder my hubby wasn’t aware I was speaking to him since I tend to ramble to myself.  Thankfully I’m getting wise in my long years. The next time I need his attention, I’ll put my nose right up to his nose, open my eyes wide making eye contact with him and blab away.  He might think I’m a bit bonkers, but he’ll know, without a doubt, that I’m speaking to him. 

Self-talk

So, when did this all begin? Talking to myself, or in other words, self-talk.  

Let’s go back, waaaay back, to the prehistoric age, actually 50+ years ago, when I was a baby. That’s when my journey of self-talk began.  You know how babies are, right?  They sit there with their toes over their heads babbling to themselves.  Self-talk!  

And boy oh boy, not to mention how extremely flexible they are, too.  Toes over their heads??? Ahh, the good ole days.  I could never get my toes over my head now! Oops, sorry, I digress…

Anyways, the self-talk continued as a young child while playing with my toys and my vivid imagination, loudly acting out scenarios and playing grown up.

As a teenager, while I was looking in the mirror at myself and saying something either positive or negative about myself – depending on my teenage angst mood.

Then, into adulthood and my one-sided conversations in the frozen food aisle. 

It’s been quite a journey and here I am.  Still talking to myself, sometimes internally, sometimes externally.

How about you? Do you self-talk?  

Your Inner Dialogue

Self-talk is your inner dialogue. Your internal voice. Your thoughts that run through your mind each and every day. All day. 

Questions. Answers. Reflection. Ideas. Fears. Desires.

It can be positive. Or negative. It can be neutral.

It can be said quietly in your mind. Silent affirmations. 

It can be said aloud (obviously my preferred method). It can be shouted out on the mountaintops.

But as you age, is it more difficult to keep your inner voice silent?  Are the thoughts too hard to contain within the mind, so they boil over, spill off the tongue to be said aloud for the world to hear?  

Is that why I’m talking to myself, out loud, more and more?

And is self-talk normal???

Well yes, my dear friend, the good news is, it is normal and healthy.  Self-talk is something many folks do and it’s okay to do it out loud.  

According to Cleveland Clinic, “Talking to yourself out loud is perfectly normal. In some cases — such as when you’re trying to increase focus — it may even be more beneficial.”

Say what?!?!?!  Beneficial??? Score!!

As you age you can get a bit foggy-brained. I’ve definitely noticed that for myself. So, talking aloud helps increase focus and organize thoughts. Nice!

Ways to Talk to Yourself

And there are all types of ways to talk to yourself, for example:

Pep Talk – Cheer yourself on as you try new things, even if it’s not perfect.  You’ll kick butt when you “go for it” and do a great job!  And that makes you feel amazing! Talk yourself into signing up for a local bicycle race, to run a community 5K for a local charity.  You can positively persuade yourself to try it.  And when you do, give yourself a high five! 

Focus Talk – Ditch the brain fog. Speaking out loud helps you stay laser focused, organized and on task with what you want to accomplish.  Not allowing any distractions derail your progress. Therefore keeping your eyes on the final outcome – the completed goal.

Decision-Making Talk – When you’re in a conundrum and need to make a decision, speaking your options, the pros and cons, outloud can help you finalize your commitment or decision.  Decisions made equals less stress.  Can you say, “Ahhhh!” 

Instructional Talk – You’re never too old to learn new tricks. And learning something new keeps your brain active and sharp. So when you challenge yourself with something new, talking it through will help you understand and retain the information much easier.

Final Thoughts

In a nutshell, talking to yourself or self-talk helps with….

• A better memory
• Being more organized
• Social benefits
• Less stress
• Understanding your own feelings

Whether you do it internally or externally, either way is healthy with plenty of benefits to boot! So, talk to yourself all you like with absolute abandon! 

I know I will. And the next time I’m in the frozen veggie section chattering away, I think I’ll choose the broccoli. 

Cheers!

Kathleen

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